Uniquely designed vibrator with six levels of pulsationThis week’s Follow-Up Friday is the Grrl Toyz Silk Touch Egg Vibe, which happens to be one of the only sex toys I’ve truly hated. I wasn’t quite so down on it at first. I mean, the uber-buzzy vibrations were more irritating than stimulating, and the flimsy clicky button that skipped functions or just didn’t work were a challenge to look past, as was the lack of variation in intensity, although props for the idea of having a dial control for that. Too bad it didn’t work. 

BUT, I loved the design, shape, and velvety finish on the plastic, so I tried very hard to overlook its shortcomings. I really wanted to like it.

Now, I look over my original review, and I see that I was way too kind. I actually gave this thing 3 stars? To be fair, the Silk Touch Egg Vibe was one of the first products I reviewed, so I hadn’t really experienced a lot of the better-quality vibes yet. Plus, back then I tended to emphasize the pros and gloss over the cons in my reviews. Still, there’s no way this bullet deserves that high of a rating.

By the time I added my follow-up review of it on EdenFantasys.com, I had grown to hate it, and I didn’t think it would ever be possible for me to hate a sex toy. I don’t think this toy ever gave me an orgasm, if so it was maybe during the first few times I used it, and it must have been an underwhelming climax if I can’t even remember whether I had it or not. Once I started reviewing more products and got my hands on better gear, I gave up even trying to like my Silk Touch Egg. It would frustrate me by its irritatingly buzzy vibrations that numbed my clit and made it impossible for me to get off.

I would visibly sneer at my Silk Touch Egg whenever I caught a glimpse of it in my toy drawer. I resented it for taking up space. It didn’t deserve to hang out with my LaysSpot and Hitachi, so I soon stashed it in the far corner of my junk drawer. And that’s where it has stayed, along with a few other toys I’ve retired because I got bored with them or found better replacements, so it’s not alone, but it’s definitely my least favorite vibe so far.

The kicker is, this thing retails for close to $30. Now, I know that’s not a lot for a sex toy, but for $30 (or less) there are much more worthy vibes out there. However, that’s just my opinion. If you look at other reviews for the Silk Touch Egg, you’ll see that quite a few people loved it, so I’ll insert the just-because-I-hate-it-doesn’t-mean-you-won’t-like-it caveat here. But I think it’s junk.